Bangkok, Bangkok, and more Bangkok! January 27- February 1, 2010 

Buddha has his eye on us. . . Probably a good thing, someone should certainly keep their eye on us! Ahhh, there is nothing like Bangkok. Imagine the hustle and bustle of street vendors, the ever so prominent aromatic combination of pollution, burning rubbish, garlic, sewage, MSG ( aka,"Black magic"), fresh fruit, rotting fruit, and Pad Thai. Sound delicious? Got your mouth watering yet? Sounds crazy, but it's the smells of Thailand that consume you. If you allow your senses to take over, your body will respond with joy. . . Thailand is special. Gross at times, like really. really gross, but special just the same.

Walking by a fruit stand it is almost impossible to deny your body the Vitamin C it craves. . . just make sure that you wash it first! Yeah right, who are we kidding! It is virtually impossible to find anything that even resembles toilet paper here, much less soap! They are pretty much nonexistent in this country. We try not to think about it. . . the Thai's ARE cooking our food!

Fresh coconuts are simply divine, and sooo cheap! If only Whole Foods would stop robbing Americans blind we could actually afford to buy them back home!

You can find anything your heart desires in Thailand, sometimes right on the street. For example, I am a huge fan of Tiger balm, meat cleavers, keys, and who doesn't love a lil' "Touch of Leather?"

Brad is beginning to get suspicious of my sporadic cleaver buying. I promise it's just for my creepy personal collection honey.. . . but how are we going to get them home? Let's sneak them in Munah' bag .. .

Yes, I say. . .

We decided that we should take advantage of the Wats around Bangkok. They are beautiful and incredibly spiritual. . . .this one even promised good luck if you put money in each and every bowl; there were about 40 bowls. We better make sure we don't miss one! We "Watted" around for a few hours and truly felt that if the 100 degree heat didn't kill us the 100% percent humidity surely would. One thing is for certain. . . a cold beer or three always helps you deal with the heat. . . OK, it's time to party. Enough is enough. We have been in Bangkok for three days already and haven't had a proper night out. . . Bangkok style. And by "Bangkok style" I mean. . .  well, you'll see.

Every night filled with debachery should always start with the proverbial hearts on a stick, followed by a grilled leg of some sort, only to be washed away by an ambrosial and oh-so- satisfying Leo beer. As Brad and I have been here before and partied our arses off, we had a slight advantage over our poor and imperceptibly innocent friend Munah. Poor poor Munah. . . little did she know. He he he!!!

Anyone care for some veggies? I do! I do! Enough about the food, let's get to the meat of the story. . . no pun intended. He he he!

 

One glass of white wine. . . 120 Baht. One large Tiger beer. . .  100 baht. People watching on Ko San Road while getting harrassed by Hill Tribe ladies trying to sell you wooden "croaking" frogs. . . Priceless.

There is something special about the Red Bull that you find here in Thailand. I have never tried crack, but if I had to make an educated guess, its' effect would be quite similar to the likes of the Red Bull here. No wonder why there are so many people addicted! Oh Red Bull, how I love thee. Munah struck up a love affair with the Bull , similar to a Harlequin Romance novel. I will spare you the disgusting details but promise you it was PG compared to what was in store for us later that evening.

We are a team, Team Customer that is. . . and we are "all for one, and one for all". Wait, that's something entirely different. . . but who cares about the semantics anyway? Let the games begin! Brad and I decided to have a few cocktails while we waited for Munah. I bought this lovely hat, only to have it blown off my head in the Tuk Tuk a few hours later, but I will get to that soon enough.

Hurray! We are in Thailand and can successfully pass as Canadians. He he he.

 This guy tried really hard to rip us off. At first he wanted 1600 Baht (about $40 USD) for one of these crappy umbrellas. . . we finally got him down to 200 Baht ($6 USD) and when we opened it up at the room, it had a huge hole in it! Not to mention that we saw them at the market the next day for $1. He then had the nerve to try to sell us more the next night! Crazy man.

We were starving and this guy, his name is Tree, offered to walk us to a Mexican restaurant. Yummy! One tequila, two tequila, three tequila. . . Ping Pong show.

We hopped in a Tuk Tuk and headed off the Patpong Red Light District. If you ever find yourself in Bangkok, the Red Light District is a must see. Not because it is amazing, or historical, or even remotely sanitary, but because where else in the world can you have a woman shoot a dart out of her woo woo and hit you in the chest (Brad), or attempt to hit a ping pong ball that has just been shot at you in the same way as the dart (Sam). Or be told that you have to pay for all the "Lady Drinks" that the sex show performers ordered, a total of 6,000 Baht.(Munah). We refused to pay the money and ran out of that cesspool of a place, but not before we caught a glimpse of a lady smoking a cigarette out of her. . . well, you get the idea. We loved every minute of it. . . even when our Tuk Tuk driver did a wheelie and my hat flew right off my head! We were all screamimg and holding on for dear life. . . but it was a freaking blast!

Here are just a few of the bars on this crazy street.

Um, what? I'm scared.

What would a night out on the town be without fried grasshoppers? No, I didn't eat one. . . but Munah sure decided to indulge!

If you've been to Thailand, then you fully understand the significane of the frog. If you have never been, you will just have to come and find out for yourself! We named him Ralph, and him and Ducky became instant friends. Ralph even took Ducky to a Muay Thai fight!

Real Muay Thai fight, Bangkok.

After the fight Ducky was so riled up that he challenged an eagle and a snake to a battle. Ducky made it out with only a few minor abrasions; one from a talon to the head, and the other from a fang to the wing. They all went out for beers after and had a grand ol' time.

Bangkok is truly a unique experience. We always have such an amazing time here, but it's now time to check out some of the Wats and ancient ruins. . .

Love, from the "tuk tuk wheelie poppin'" capital of the world- The Savvy Nomad Family